Dikhyaa Mohanty 
“Oh, she is talking to men, and she is married. No shame”
“She is married!!!! She doesn’t look like it! Where is the sindoor? It seems like she doesn’t want people to know that she is married”
“They are so close. They must have an affair”
“She got that project so easily; she must have used her women’s card”
These are some of the preconceived notions people have in my life. While discussing this with some of my friends, we come up with unclear thoughts about the difference between being judgmental and expressing an opinion. I would concede that there is frequently some uncertainty between the two as our opinions frequently stem from judgments. Complicating matters is the definition of opinion in the dictionary: a view or judgment made about something. The definition of judgment is an opinion or conclusion, according to a dictionary search. So how can we distinguish between expressing an opinion and rendering a judgment?
The border between the two states is relatively thin. Opinions are the sum of your personal experiences, those of others around you, your likes and dislikes, and the things you’ve read and seen that have shaped your perspective of the world. Your brain stores all of the information you have ever been exposed to, which moulds your worldview. Opinions are flexible and subject to debate. As a result, your ideas may develop and alter as you gain more experience or knowledge. It is crucial to remember that views are not always supported by facts in this situation. It’s also critical to remember that information evolves over time.
Statements are judgments. They are assertions of opinion that do not allow for debate. You’ve come to the definite conclusion that your viewpoint is the only one that matters. As a result, judgments are firm and frequently based on our underlying values. The risk of passing judgment arises in this situation. Your ideas just represent one side of the coin in a world where there are seldom any absolutes since they are shaped by the experiences you have had throughout your life. Based on our individual experiences throughout our lives, each and every one of us will see the coin in a unique way. You have crossed the line into being judgemental when you begin to present opinions as declarations of fact, leaving no space for the notion that there may be another side to that coin.
Let’s be clear: We all form opinions. Making a decision is not always good or negative. We base our decisions on our judgments when we make them. Nearly every day, we hear the phrase “someone made a judgment call.” Therefore, passing judgment is something we all do on a daily basis. We get into trouble when we start employing them as judgments of right and wrong or as scales of someone’s goodness or deservingness based on our own ideals.
Like-
We make a judgment on a lady based on the length of her dress. She may not actually be wearing the wrong clothes, though. It can just imply that it is too brief for us. We are being judgmental when we begin to evaluate her character based on an outfit that we would not wear.
A judgment is made when a married couple without children is referred to as selfish. Maybe they are unable to have kids? Maybe they’re trying, but they’re having trouble. Maybe they have a plan for their future together and will have kids later when they are surer that they can support them. Maybe they’ve come to the conclusion that their way of life won’t enable them to provide their kids with the stability they think they need. It is judgmental to judge them based on our own views of family life.
We think a lady is too open and flexible when we observe her drinking with her pals or her male friends. We are being judgmental by interpreting this to indicate that she can be friends with anyone and have affairs with every one. It would be appropriate to inquire as to what assumptions you are making about women who are drinking with guys, even if we know that individual.
Do you know what you’re doing? Am I making assumptions about individuals and their actions? We must be conscious of our motivations since our relationships with others and ourselves will be impacted by our judgements, whether they are constructive or destructive, out loud or unsaid. Think about how our approach to the management of our relationships will change if we believe that someone single and childless is leading a selfish, pointless existence. How would it affect how we feel about ourselves as our bodies change throughout our lifetimes if we believe that individuals who are overweight are selfish and lazy? Observing the opinions, we have about other people can help us improve the way we conduct our own lives and our relationships with one another.
